Bernadette
A Hard Road
It’s not as glamorous as you may seem to think.
It may seem all
pretty,
it may seem like
it’s a wonderful life that we have,
but it’s not.
It’s a hard road.
If there is anyway .
. .
if I’d known what I
know now,
I would trade in a
second
to get back where I
was as a child.
I would have gone back home
knowing now what I
know.
It’s not been an
easy road.
I’ve seen a lot of horrible
things down here.
Experienced horrible
things.
If you don’t have
to,
don’t come here
don’t do drugs.
It takes pain away
for a minute,
for whatever time
that it is,
but the pain keeps
coming back.
the memories
whatever it is that
you are trying to forget
keep coming back
they are always with
you.
Is there something specific you want to forget?
my childhood
the drugs numbed it
The Documentary
I
hope that it reaches some kids.
If it helps even one
kid, you know
stop them from
coming down here,
it would make my
heart just fill with joy.
It just kills me to
see the young girls coming down here
So young, you know,
like 12 years old, 13 years old
Out there on the
street corners, you know
having to turn
tricks for drugs
and for their pimps.
If it stops even one
of them
from coming down
here
and going back home,
that would make me
happy.
It would have been
all worthwhile.
Nowhere Fast
I
just really hope that . . .
that they (kids)
really think
I know it’s always
hard when you are running away from home.
There’s a lot of
pain.
There’s reasons why
you don’t want to come home.
But let me tell you,
try to make it work
out.
Talk to somebody to
try to make things work out
Because nothing,
nothing cud be worse than being down here.
I mean, I was raped,
molested as a child
when I was at home
and that’s nothing
to me compared to being down here.
So if there is any
way, please
do whatever you can
to work it out
because there isn’t
a life down here
You just die
You just end up
going nowhere, fast.
Keep one day at a time
And that’s no AA,
that’s just me
That’s the only way
I can do it for now
it keeps me going.
Black and white photos by Chris Young.
copyright 2001: Ellavon: An Ezine of Basic
Culture and Kat Kosiancic